What I've done, what I do and what I'll be doing.

You know, I've been doing Lets Plays for a very long time now.  Well, time is relative but it's been what?  3-4 years since I started?  Did you know that I used to do other stuff with my spare time before?  Crazy concept, I know!

I used to work on a webcomic series for roughly eleven years.  A series which shall remain unnamed (you wouldn't want me to die from embarrassment, would you?).  I did it because I had a huge obstacle to overcome as an artist.

Hang on!  Let me go back even further!

I was one of those guys that started doing computer generated imagery at a very early age, when CGI was at it's infancy.  I mean, the original Toy Story wasn't even out yet.  I was in elementary school and I was doing computer animation with vector-based graphics.  It was cool, I was making (at the time) nice pictures.  I wasn't really thinking too much of it but I knew that, as an aspiring special effects artist (not to be confused with visual effects, special effects are the old school stuff with smoke and mirrors to trick the camera) that this was going to be the new way forward for the film industry.  Of course, the pioneers of the industry new that way better than I but I always took comfort in knowing that I managed to see it myself.  You know, proof that I wasn't a complete retard.

I devoted myself almost exclusively to the creation of CGI.  I played games, yes, but nowhere near the amount that I do now.  Back then, my craft came above any form of entertainment as I was essentially creating enterainment itself.  Do you know what that does to an artist?  To go headlong at such an early age?
It means that I had practically zero traditional art experience.  It's really bad considering that all the tools are designed for those artists in mind.  Cameras and lights are configured with different lens and intensity as they would in real life and animation shares the same principles such as Keyframes.

I didn't know how to draw and that was made obvious when I got to college and saw that my peers had absolutely no technical know-how yet had amazing drawings, paintings or photographs.  Sure, I had advantage(s). Primarily, I knew what the teachers were talking about where the other students struggled to adapt.  The thing is, the teachers didn't know what to do with me.  They were there to train artists to use softwares... you know, to push buttons.  I knew the buttons and (more importantly) knew how they worked, so I had to become an artist.

So that was eleven years ago.  I wanted to have a reason to practice regularly; to hone my skill.  How did I go about it?  I started drawing a webcomic because the basic idea was to produce something consistently every week.  With it, I learned not only how to draw, but how to tell a story or the timing of jokes, composition and layout, colours, etc.  I stopped working on the webcomic about the same time I started doing Lets Plays, actually.  While I would've loved to continue the series, something was amiss which lead me to abandon the project.

I was doing it because I wanted to get better at 3D; to do animated shorts.  I was doing that more than anything else.  I wasn't doing what I fell in love with.  My choice of words is very particular here because last week was a significant romantic episode in my life (one of the many reasons of my absence on Youtube).  While the reality of that episode greatly pained me, I've come to the realization that my life wasn't necessarily about WHO I loved, but WHAT.

What, indeed.  So it's about time that I continue what I do.  Not only as a job, but in my spare time also.  To keep the creative spark alive.  I've been attached to my webcomic series mostly due to the time investment involved to polish the characters and to create a very unique world.  It didn't take too much brain-storming to adapt the core fundamentals of the characters and humour into what will be a trilogy of two-minutes-long animated shorts.  So, in the end, what I've done for my webcomic will yet again serve me in what I do: to make awesome shit.

I had the idea of an animated short loosely based on my webcomic for about a year now.  All from a simple concept art, really.  The illustrations shows what would happen during the first part of the trilogy.  It only became a trilogy shortly after my romantic episode when new and better ideas started to pop up.  I suddenly had so many cool ideas that I had to split them up or else I'd run the risk of never being able to complete the project.  The goal here is to have each parts of the trilogy stand-alone while telling a larger story when played back-to-back.  So the focus is to create the first part which will most likely take another two years to complete.

A long time, you may say.  Well, I've been living with the characters in my head for eleven years so two more is practically nothing.  I'm in pre-production right now, working on storyboards to flesh out the pacing.  How will this affect my Lets Plays?  I don't know.  I suspect that playing games will be a weekend affair allowing me to focus on the project while I upload videos during the week.

Bah!  It feels like I'm rambling and I'm too tired to check and see if anything I've been saying has been coherent.  Good luck making sense of it all!

Here's the original concept:

The worst article I've read in a long, long time.

An IGN article on Skyrim and Dark Souls was brought to my attention this morning and I've got to say it's by far the worst article I've read in a long, long time.  It's entitled "Top Five Reasons Dark Souls Will Eat Skyrim's Face" and that's something that'll grab immediate attention to anyone who calls themselves a gamer on multiple fronts:
- Fans of The Elder Scrolls series.
- Fans of Demon's Souls.
- Gamers in general who enjoy reading and/or starting flame wars.

As you might have guessed, I fall in the first category but it's not so much the taunt that grabbed my attention but, like some others (I hope I'm not alone here), I noticed that a title like that promises a lot of biased and unfounded nonsense.

Maybe Dark Souls deserves the praise, but not in this fashion.  If this article represents some form of "victory" (because, you know, it's important for some folks to have a winner in this stupid debate - because the debate needed to exist in the first place) then it is very much a shallow one.

Let me go out of the way and say "TLDR: I think the article is a pile of shit written by an uneducated tool".  You might be thinking "relax man, there's just doing it for attention". Well, yeah!  It still sucks and now I'm convinced that I should never find myself reading an IGN article ever again.  Mission accomplished, I suppose.

So here we go with the dissection:

"Here are five reasons why Dark Souls will save gaming"

Wow!  Just wow.  That quoted sentence alone establishes the tone of this article and I don't even need to elaborate.  I could stop my ranting right now!

1) So the first argument that Dark Souls is supposedly better than Skyrim is that it offers and "TRUELY innovative" multiplayer.  The article even goes as far as demean Bethesda for trying (and failing) at implementing any at all.

My first thought is that "well, yes!  It's definitely easier to implement multiplayer in a DUNGEON CRAWLER!".  Of course multiplayer is going to be one of the most compelling features of Dark Souls and if it compromised the single player experience IN A DUNGEON CRAWLER then From Software fails at basic game design.

"From Software has innovated while others have passed on making the effort."

You need to play more games, dude.  That's all I've got to say.  Multiplayer in RPGs is a very difficult thing to do both from a design and technical standpoint.  I can't think of any good ones that actually pulled it off.  You can't fault Bethesda for playing on their strengths.

"Hey!  This game has a feature that the other lacks!  Then it must mean that it's more fun and, therefore, way better, right?"

2) Oh god!  That's the second "Top list" I've read/heard in two days that had "DLC and pricing" as an argument.  Although, to IGN's credit, they seem to know a little bit about the games they're talking about.

You either have a good game, or a bad one.  Content that may or may not exist (or pricing for that matter) doesn't change that fact.  It might be an incentive to purchase, true, but it doesn't magically make the game better or worse.  Do you know what's the most shocking part of all that is?  The writer of the IGN article says that Dark Souls won't have any DLC and, because of that (and a lower price point), the game will be better.

Mind-blowing fail!

Enough of stupid shit, I say!  Let's move on!

3) The size and scope of the games.  I'm going to give some credit here merely due to the fact that I honestly don't know how each will measure up compared to their respective predecessors and from one another.

To me, this was an okay argument despite being more subjective than anything or going purely based on speculation.  That is, until they mentioned that Dark Souls was better because the game showed improvement over it's predecessor while Skyrim looked (to them) very much the same as Oblivion.

I'd argue against Skyrim's scale but I really don't have to.  That's a stupid point to make and is completely irrelevant.  Besides, let's give the benefit of a doubt that Dark Souls is as vast and unique as IGN claims.  Does the quantity and size of the game really matter?  Sure, it helps but it (again) doesn't make or break a game.  It merely puts more VALUE to the purchase and we've already established (see #2) that this was a mind-blowingly stupid argument.

Using his argument, does this mean that Daggerfall trumps Dark Souls? How old is that game, 1992?  Solid argument, there IGN, bravo!  /sarcasm.

4) The difficulty and combat.  See, if the writer had entitled this article as "The one reason why I think Dark Souls is better than Skyrim", then all he could've written was how much he preferred old-school gaming and how challenging they were and I would've nodded in respect.  Hell, mention how Oblivion was obnoxiously holding our hands with quest message pop-ups and quest markers while you're at it and I still wouldn't have flinched.

The Elder Scrolls have been plagued with sub-par combat and, as much as I love the series, I'll be the first one to admit that.  But then, by #3 logic, Skyrim should prove to be superior because it has improved (and the IGN writer even confirms that) while Dark Souls is pretty much on par with Demon's Souls.  Do you guys see where I'm getting at?  The article is just everywhere and any form of logic that was used to write that garbage can be used to counter a different argument...  And I'm not jumping forward either; I'm using previously established logic (set by IGN) and using it against the following point.

Enough of that, though, the article brings up a good point so I'll give it to them.

5) "Some fans are praising the game, simply because it has Dragons.  Have they seen Dark Souls?"

You mean, "Have I seen scripted boss fights involving dragons before?"  Yeah!  Plenty!  The reason why people have been praising Skyrim for their dragons is due to the improved Radiant AI that's making them "go".

Idiot.

Anyways, the main argument here is that Dark Souls is better because the designs are more exotic and varied.  Sure!  Have a cookie.  Now go away; you're giving me a headache!

It's not a BAD argument, really.  It's just that the way he shrugs off Skyrim's dragons just seems like he didn't do research on the game.  Maybe it's the The Elder Scrolls fan in me that's crying out this time, I don't know.  We won't know Skyrim's dragons until we see them in our own games and Skyrim might fail to meet our expectations just like Oblivion did based on the 2003 E3 demo.

Besides, the dragons showcased in GuildWars 2 are the ones I'm REALLY interested in.

So just how much of Dark Soul REALLY is better than Skyrim?  We just don't know.  What we do know is that the writer of the IGN article has a preference to more challenging and action-oriented, twitch-based combat.  Sure, Skyrim might be action-oriented, but we're here for other things...  For me, that's playing an RPG where I can be and do whatever I want without having the game punishing me from playing it my way.

"There's your bag of chips. What more do you want?"

Your resignation, that's what!

Reading 'n Gaming

Over the recent years, a lot of people have told me that my English was very good.  Pronunciation and grammar could still need some work but they thought that I had a strong vocabulary.  I have books and Star Trek to thank for that.  I watched Star Trek even before I could fully understand the language; it's people in colored uniforms shooting laser beams at aliens.  As a kid, that's all I need!  Reading books, on the other hand, I picked up much, much later during my college years 11 years ago (makes me feel old just thinking about it).

Anyways, I read a lot of books.  Paper-back novels to be precise and most turn out to be of the fantasy genre.  You know, orcs and elves.  It's kind of a huge U-turn from colored uniforms shooting laser beams but, whatever.  While not being the very first series I've devoured, R.A. Salvatore's "the dark elf trilogy" is probably the series of books I've liked the best.

Now a days, I tend to read novels based off video games.  Games such as Diablo, Warcraft, GuildWars, Starcraft and even The Elder Scrolls.  You know what the strange part of all this is?  Every time someone sees me reading these books they get all curious until they see the title.  "Oooh what are you reading?  Tha--  Oh!  It's one of your games isn't it?  Bah!"

... And then they drop the topic.  It's always the same thing.  Why?  What's wrong with my books?  I get more interesting characters and story than any of these folks would ever get from their TV shows (which, for a lot of people, consists of nothing but drama - especially those reality shows) and on top of that, it keeps me involved in my hobby when I'm away from the computer and they're snubbing my reading?

I hate hypocrites!

Why is anything related to gaming perceived as this inferior thing?  Those people never played a video game since PAC-MAN!  No!  Chances are they never even played that either!  You know what's really stupid about all this, these people think that way because video games "are meant for little kids" and they're the ones complaining about video games being murder simulators...

To these folks, I say: "It takes an open mind to read my kind of books; that you're not reading these is probably for the best."

If you've never played PAC-MAN because, you know, some of you might be too young for that time, go play it now!

GixGone7

I never expected the kind of success I've had while making Let's Play videos so you can imagine my reaction when an impostor was first brought to my attention.

At first I thought it was a joke. "oh, how cute!" I said out loud. "that's kind of clever". I blocked the user to avoid any further confusion on my channel and thought that'd be the end of it.

It turns out he or she is still active to the point that the impostor's channel is keeping up to date to mirror my own. As if that's not creepy enough, the person in question is impersonating me and commenting on other people's videos. The act (as well as the comments) are both immature and impolite and I'm extremely appalled by all this.

So I'm letting you guys know: I rarely comment on other people's videos so the chances that it's actually me commenting on a particular video are very slim. I'm more inclined to never comment outside my own channel, actually, because that's the only place I know where that impostor is blocked.

I've been planning some cools thing with Skyrim coming up to bring the LP to a new level but this kind of crap really kills the motivation.

I'll be contacting YouTube on the issue.

Morrowind in danger

You might not like what you're about to read.  Consider yourself warned.

For the past month, I've been desperately trying to get Morrowind's recording to work again.  It's not a codec issue or anything, it's just that what allows me to play Morrowind in my Mac environment is conflicting with my recording software.  I can play and record Mac games just fine but Morrowind footage ends up being black.

I guess the clue was that Morrowind was running surprisingly smooth until I start recording - which turns into a hideous slideshow... that records black.  So whatever made Morrowind run better on my Mac is making recording essentially impossible.

You know the saying "Don't fix what ain't broke"?  Well it partially applies in this situation as I updated a few softwares.  The thing is, I don't know which software is the culprit.  You see, I updated to Mac OS X Lion the moment it was available, I then updated ScreenFlow which allows me to record my videos so that it could run on the new OS and I did the same thing with Crossover Games (which makes Morrowind-on-Mac possible).  So, basically, every software that made the Morrowind LP possible was updated and something in the mix is failing to work harmoniously.

You might be thinking "why don't you simply revert them back?" well, that's because the saying only PARTIALLY applies?  My computer WAS broken and desperately needed the update(s) for many aspects of my life; be it work, casual computing or even gaming.

... it just fails for Morrowind or, more specifically, it fails for the Lets Play since the game runs like a dream when I'm not recording.

What's putting even more fuel to the problem is the issues I've been getting with my Youtube channel lately.  Granted, I haven't been very frequent with my uploads but I had my reasons.  It's not like I don't WANT to play Morrowind or Oblivion, it's just that I COULDN'T.  Well, nothing stops me from uploading some Oblivion videos other than the fact that Morrowind's LP would remain broken.

These days, I'm either exhausted from work or troubleshooting my LPs or, worse yet, trying to moderate my channel.  It probably has been just as frustrating for me as it has been for you.  I know how frustrating it is to not have your show available (a show that you invested time in).

Something needs to be done on all fronts or else Morrowind's LP is canned.  On the first front (and this is a personal thing), I need to try and do less stuff each day.  If I do get home by 7pm, I should take an hour to eat and go to bed at 10pm at the latest and maybe then I'll have the energy to play Morrowind once or twice a week or god forbid every day like I want to.  Because, right now, I'm less productive by trying to stay up all night to do productive stuff... a vicious circle that CAN be broken.  So I'll try to work on that.

The second issue is probably the most complicated one to tackle as it is technical in nature.  My setup HAS to change somehow because this roller-coaster of a technical mess isn't working for me.  The first step will be to go back to my original Parallels Desktop setup, the end result is slower than Crossover Games but it causes less issues with recording.  The reason why I haven't done that yet is simply because my Parallels Desktop client needs to be updated as well... or else you would've seen Morrowind videos already.  Unlike the others, this update is expensive.  It's expensive because what I get out of it isn't worth the money as I don't use Windows on my laptop to work anymore... and all my games work on Crossover Games if they're not already native to OS X.  Not to mention that there's no guarantee that it would work either.

So why not just Bootcamp and go directly in Windows?  Ever since I started my Oblivion LP, I've been thinking it.  Why I haven't done so already is simple: because I'm stubborn.  The picture-in-picture that I'm known for has to stay.  I know other LPers managed to get a webcam setup in Windows, I just haven't figured it out yet.  This is probably the best solution as it'll also help my future Skyrim LP.  If I can get it to work for Morrowind, it should work for Skyrim as well.  I need something that won't require me to sync 4 tracks at every session.

As for my Youtube channel, I have done a lot of thinking and the answer is unfortunate but simple: I'll just have every comment go through the validation process.  More work for me, you say?  Maybe.  The way I see it, it'll just take a lot of time before I get to approve your comment(s).  There is the ban hammer to consider and I am willing to wield it with brutality but, since I have ZERO patience with that sort of thing, I might end up banning my entire audience.

So what am I doing?  I don't know.  I suppose I can start uploading Oblivion more regularly for a bit and then work on fixing Morrowind every once in a while.  That's what I did last time...

On Anticipations

I think it's obvious that I'm a gamer.  Those categorized as such will often succumb to a very maddening shortcoming: impatience.  Impatience  has many ways of manifesting especially in gaming.  While most end up annoying the heck out of those around you, there is at least one that really only affects oneself.

Waiting for a game to come out in stores is painfully annoying.  I had to think for a while to see if "painfully" was the right choice of words to describe it.  What is the symptom of anticipation?  A constant reminder that one has the time to play said game despite being unavailable and, at the same time, one doesn't feel like playing anything else during the wait.  It's painful because the time wasted thinking about it or reading about it could've been spent on either playing another game or doing something else (and possibly more productive) and the person in question is AWARE OF IT.  It's disrupting and I think we've all been there.

I consider myself lucky because that feeling is very new to me.  When growing up, I played the games that were available to me and those games were rarely new.  In fact, I don't recall receiving video games as presents or going to a store to see rows of games on the shelves.  All I know is that I had games and I played them.  They were just there.  It wasn't until I was in my teens that I was introduced to the concept of going to a store to get games.

Marathon and Warcraft comes to mind; and then I discovered sequels.  The thing is, I was so "late in the game" (get it?) that I didn't have to wait for the sequels to come out.  They had already come out one or two years prior.

A very good example of this is Diablo.  After playing the game for two years, I happen to come across Diablo II in stores.  So I bought it and started to discuss the awesomeness of the game to my new friends in college who, to my surprise, informed me of Lord of Destruction (Diablo II's expansion pack).  I was still playing through Act 1 at that time and I already had new features and more content.  While I secretly hoped for a Diablo 3, it never was a game that I was anticipating until Blizzard Entertainment announced it back in 2008.

The Elder Scrolls is a mystery to me because it was one of those games that people always told me about back when Morrowind was the new thing in RPGs but I just shrugged it off thinking I wouldn't be interested.  Can you blame me?  I had my Diablos; TWO of them!   Then  World of Warcraft showed up.  While I knew WoW was coming, it didn't think I'd be willing to pay a monthly fee so I didn't wait for it (in fact I was playing Neverwinter Nights in online persistent realms).  When I decided to play WoW (after trying the beta), the game was out.

I bought Oblivion on launch day (in 2006) including a DVD player for an old PC that was donated to me by a friend.  That was the biggest video game related purchase I've ever done even to this day... It's also my first PC game purchase.  That's the real big mystery for me.  How does a Mac user just go out and buy not only a PC game (and a single-player game at that; I'm a multi-player guy), but PC hardware for a machine that was barely making the minimum requirements to play said game... On launch day?  The E3 demo did it.  It had completely sold me on the concept and while the video looked too good to be true, I figured that if I could experience a fraction of what I saw in the demo, I'd be satisfied.

Since then I've bought GuildWars, Dungeon Siege II-III (the original being available on the mac) and Magicka.  And now I find myself "caught up" and for the first time in my life, I'm eagerly waiting for my games to come out in stores.  It's a strange feeling and I laugh every time I think about it.  What's stranger still is the shift of priorities in my games.  I find myself anticipating Skyrim much more than Diablo III (a game I've been wanting to play for 10 years now).  It's almost embarrassing, actually, but it really illustrates the quality and magic of The Elder Scrolls.  Maybe it's because I don't really notice the wait for Diablo III as much anymore......

Not only that, I've been writing these blogs on the go with my iPad 2.  I've had it since it came out and, like The Elder Scrolls, it has also shifted my habits.  Other than doing my 3D work and record Let's Play videos, I don't really use my laptop anymore.  The iPad completely took over my lifestyle.  As a Mac user, that sort of shift is not uncommon.  But the strange part is that I'm now considering buying a PC to play Skyrim.  I hate the Windows platform with a passion.  I sound like a grumpy old guy at work when I have to use my PC machine (I also work with a Mac).

Skyrim is a "killer app" for a platform I despise.  The idea would be to "live" with my iPad and play a select few games on the PC.  The thought of buying a console has crossed my mind.  They're decently priced, having no mods never bothered me and it would do the things I'd want it to do save for the awkward controllers.  Perhaps I could even get into the Halo games if I got an Xbox.  I've been wanting to try out firefight for a while now... Then again, I'd be missing out on GuildWars 2.  Its funny to consider that, despite being very good, the other games don't have the same effect as The Elder Scrolls.

Regardless, The Elder Scrolls might be my biggest video game related purchase once more and I know it'll be worth every penny.

Here's my list of anticipated games:
- Skyrim.
- Diablo 3.
- GuildWars 2.

Now I have to find the time to play them all as they're all coming out around the same time-frame.

Diablo 3 going to hell?

To put it bluntly, Blizzard Entertainment has announced recently that Diablo 3 will require a constant connection to the Battle.net servers in order to play.  As  disappointed as I am by that fact, I had to take some time to think about it.

Would I really play in single-player?  No.  That's not my thing.  I'm a Battle.net guy after all.  So why am I bothered by lack of single-player, or even LAN for that matter?

The answer is in two parts:

Firstly, as a consumer, I expect MORE features in the products I buy.  Diablo 2 had eight player CO-OP, 5 character classes, a more robust online experience, a personal stash, more variety of item mechanics (gems, weapon sets, tomes, etc), a better presentation and a more polished gameplay (the ability to run).  I probably missed a few but that's a lot of improvements over the original.

Now, I'm not suggesting that Diablo 3 won't have it's share of improvements, but it seems that they're taking a few steps back at the same time.  You have to stop and think about the reasoning behind their design choices; at least the one they're feeding us.  To prevent hackers and cheaters.

Before I talk more about my opinion on this, I have to point out something about this logic.  It's a very good one.  One might say: "why don't you separate the characters between offline and online?  That'll prevent the cheating, right?". It's not about whenever or not a character is online that causes the hacks and cheats, its how the game handles the information that allows these things to exist.

When playing multi-player games, the computers involved have to send each other information.  Character location, health, items, attacks, etc.  It's all encrypted but it's a heck of a lot easier to decode that when it's happening on an isolated network (read : LAN).  Online games have a security advantage because it's all run by the servers... The servers tells your computer what's going on and your computer can't change that.

That's why Starcraft 2 doesn't have LAN support.  It's also a bitch to code so no LAN = simpler code.  If Starcraft 2 had LAN, hackers would be able to figure out the intricacies of the code and ruin the game for everyone.  Anything that's client side can be easily hacked.

But here's the second part:  Starcraft 2 is a COMPETITIVE game.  Diablo 3 is not.  In fact, it's practically exclusively PvM (player vs monster - or PvE for the young folks).  So why can't Diablo 3 have an offline mode when Starcraft 2 does?  For security reasons?  Bullshit!  Of the two games, Starcraft is the one that needs the uptight security.  It's a game designed to play against people.

"Well," you might say to yourself, "Diablo 3 does have an auction house involving real money.  You wouldn't want that to be cracked and abused."

That's true.  One might be able to crack the code if the auction house was part of the SINGLE-PLAYER experience...  What?  Hello?  You're going solo and your offline, just make your auction house a server-only deal and your problem is solved.  If your playing solo, the last thing on your mind is trading with other players.  Sure, you'll be able to do that in Diablo 3 but at what cost?  The lack of offline mode?  No thanks!

As disappointed as i am, I'm still buying it.  Curse you, Blizzard!

See yah starside!

I realize that a lot of people come to me to hear my thoughts about gaming in general.  How do I play games?  What makes a particular game better than another?  What do I do when I'm not playing games?  How much time do I spend on a particular game?  What do I do for a living?  Does gaming affect my social and/or romantic life?  etc.

I have my doubts that an average joe would give a crap about what I do or think, but a lot of people have shown genuine interest in my past time.  WHY?  I not really sure.  Perhaps they can associate with me.  I like to think it's because I know and truly understand the reasoning behind my opinions... or better yet, I know how to express them.  Theoretically speaking, of course.  And they, in turn, understand that.  Maybe it's a perspective they haven't seen yet or maybe they finally found a like-minded soul and are curious to see how much further that connection goes.

The longer I observe society, the fewer people seem to be capable of sharing opinions and/or ideas.  It's not necessarily a bad thing.  You're not a bad person for not knowing why you like something.  Indecisiveness is a pet-peve of mine, however.  It's a double-edged sword really because those that do share their opinions turn out to be tools that really don't have an opinion for themselves or they're merely full of themselves.  A least a lot of folks seem that way.  I hate those kind of people but who said I wasn't one of them?  How do I justify my self-claimed seclusion from that kind of people?  I like to believe that I'm not a hypocrite; oblivious to my potential flaw.

Some say I'm cocky.  To them, I say: "I'm just confident in what I do.  Be ready to put your beliefs in the line or get out of my way."  If you can't handle an argument, don't start one.  "Prove me wrong and you'll see how humble I am."

I got my hands full making videos already but there's a lot of potential downtime that can be utilized productively (mainly while I'm in the commute).  It seems there's so much more than I can share I could almost picture my mind exploding and broadcast my thoughts to everyone as each pieces of my brain reaches them.

I'm not alone, I'm sure.  The trick is to reach people individually and not as a group.  You know what they say: "A person is smart, but people are stupid."

Is this the next step?  A blog?  I'm honestly not sure yet.  It seems very wishy-washy "hello journal" type of thing to do which is typically not something I do.  However, like my Lets Play of Morrowind, it might turn out being something far greater than I imagined.  The biggest difference being one medium has a potential audience other than myself.  Maybe then I'll be able to answer my question in the 2nd paragraph.

I'll just write and see if I really am an asshole or not.